Bye Bye Birdie

Saying goodbye to someone you care about is never easy. It does not mater if the parting of ways was by your choice or due to circumstances beyond your control. Whether it is a friend, a relative, or a lover there is a degree of pain that will always linger in your heart. Sometimes there is a gaping hole when that love once was, sometimes it may just be a little nick.

I have not written about this yet as I have been busy and needed to come to terms with the fact that as much as I want to,I cannot save the world and help everyone in it, no matter how much they mean to me.

Shortly before Christmas, My extended family had a small crisis. My sister-in-law (Jenna*)and her husband (*frank) wound up with temporary custody of his 4 great grandsons ages 10 months to 6 years. We (my Jenna and I) spent a lot of time going from one charity or agency to another for about 4 days in a row to get things these sweet little boys needed. I bought enough items for the boys to have a small Christmas even though I should have used it on bills. I just couldn't see 4 kids going without on a day children anticipate all year.
The children were removed from their home because of neglect. I spent additional money on lice shampoos and sprays, cough medicines, diapers, and Tylenol. I did not care, as long as the boys were happy, healthy, and safe. Jenna and Frank are a bit older than my husband and I. She has rheumatoid arthritis and he has a myriad of health issues including heart problems and caring for them was proving to be extremely difficult and detrimental to their own health. I took the boys whenever possible to give them a break, it seems I always had at least one of them in my home.

Two weeks ago, they boys went into the foster care system. Frank had been having chest pains on and off for a week and his doctor told him he was on the verge of another heart attack if he continued to care for the boys. The stress of taking in 4 little ones that young was just too much. I tried so hard to find a way to take the boys myself. I plotted, planed, and schemed. I made countless phone calls to various agencies but in the end I guess it just wasn't meant to be. I barely get by on my bills even with both my husband and I working, how was I going to afford 4 more children, three of whom were still in diapers. It would take a while to get certified for foster care and the entire time they lived with me until I was, I would not get financial help caring for them. Then there was the mater of space and where to put them. In reality, our house is too small for my family of 6 let alone adding four more into the mix. Also was the mater of my landlord allowing the extra bodies into which is essentially HIS house. I got a big fat no on that one. It is not that he is a bad landlord, he is excellent actually, it was more of a worry about fire safety and such. I scoured our local newspaper for a larger place but there was nothing available. Everything was either smaller or way out of our price range. It is impossible to pay $800 for rent on our income. Regrettably I had to say goodbye.
Up until they came to live with Jenna and Frank, I had met the oldest two boys only once. The other two I had only heard about their births. During the short time they were here, I fell in love with them. I will miss these little guys every day and I pray that wherever their lives take them they will continue to be cherished and loved as much as they deserve to be.

*Names have been changed for privacy