Once again, I am facing the fact that I will soon be having to say goodbye to someone I love deeply. My great Aunt has cancer, we have known it for a while. The cancer is widespread, treatment would most likely would be of no use. She is 82 years old and has chose to not undergo any treatment. She is of sound enough mind to make this decision fully informed and is aware of the fact that she IS going to die very soon.
She spent the past year after her diagnosis at home with a nurse who came in to assist her daily with bathing and food preparation and she is now a resident in the nursing facility in which I work. I highly doubt that she will get "well" enough to go back to her little apartment in the retirement building in which she has lived for many years to die with hospice as she wishes. I do not say this to her as I do not want to shatter the one dream she has left. I have been around the elderly and those facing death long enough to recognise without being told that she has a few weeks at best before she is gone.
My "Aunt B" (as I have always called her) is the person who gave me my love for musicals, reading, and playing scrabble. She never married or had children and I guess I was kind of her surrogate child. She would come pick me up and take me to her house and we would spend hours playing scrabble, eat a lunch of sandwiches, chips and soda, and play even more scrabble. She would take me to all the musicals produced by the local high schools and theater groups. One of my dreams to this day, is to go to NYC and see a broadway play or musical. We scoured used book stores and I would spend the nigh at her apartment, both of us curled up in a chair or on the couch reading, the television was rarely on during our time together.
In Summer, we would go to a family member's farm and swim in the pond. There were corn roasts and picnics, balloon rallies and carnivals, and the occasional treat of lunch at Micky D's.
In Fall it would be going to the local cider mill for fresh pressed cider and delicious fresh backed doughnuts that were so light and airy the almost melted in your mouth. We also enjoyed yearly jaunts to a pumpkin farm, fall festivals, "haunted houses", raking and jumping in to leaves. Fall is , to this day, may favorite season. I love the smell of wood smoke wafting on the air and the crunch of leaves underfoot because of her. I still occasionally, at the age of 40, cannot resist the impulse of jumping into a big pile of leaves.
In Winter there was sled riding and the thrill and excitement of everything that Christmas brings. Carols, sled riding, snowmen, and midnight services. We always enjoyed the challenge of going to the mall and fighting the crowds to shop for presents. There was just something about exhilarating finding our favorite parking spot. It was always there, year after year. It was near a back entrance to one of the mall stores and seemed to be waiting just for us like a secret friend. I still prefer to shop this way during the holiday season.
Spring it would bring long wandering drives to nowhere, picking wild flowers from random fields, and kite flying.
I will always cherish the memories of our time together. My Aunt B has many other great nieces and nephews, but for some reason I was always her favorite. In a home were I often felt ignored or unloved, she was a great blessing to my childhood. She was my escape and my confidant.
Jan 27, 2009
Bye Bye Birdie
Saying goodbye to someone you care about is never easy. It does not mater if the parting of ways was by your choice or due to circumstances beyond your control. Whether it is a friend, a relative, or a lover there is a degree of pain that will always linger in your heart. Sometimes there is a gaping hole when that love once was, sometimes it may just be a little nick.
I have not written about this yet as I have been busy and needed to come to terms with the fact that as much as I want to,I cannot save the world and help everyone in it, no matter how much they mean to me.
Shortly before Christmas, My extended family had a small crisis. My sister-in-law (Jenna*)and her husband (*frank) wound up with temporary custody of his 4 great grandsons ages 10 months to 6 years. We (my Jenna and I) spent a lot of time going from one charity or agency to another for about 4 days in a row to get things these sweet little boys needed. I bought enough items for the boys to have a small Christmas even though I should have used it on bills. I just couldn't see 4 kids going without on a day children anticipate all year.
The children were removed from their home because of neglect. I spent additional money on lice shampoos and sprays, cough medicines, diapers, and Tylenol. I did not care, as long as the boys were happy, healthy, and safe. Jenna and Frank are a bit older than my husband and I. She has rheumatoid arthritis and he has a myriad of health issues including heart problems and caring for them was proving to be extremely difficult and detrimental to their own health. I took the boys whenever possible to give them a break, it seems I always had at least one of them in my home.
Two weeks ago, they boys went into the foster care system. Frank had been having chest pains on and off for a week and his doctor told him he was on the verge of another heart attack if he continued to care for the boys. The stress of taking in 4 little ones that young was just too much. I tried so hard to find a way to take the boys myself. I plotted, planed, and schemed. I made countless phone calls to various agencies but in the end I guess it just wasn't meant to be. I barely get by on my bills even with both my husband and I working, how was I going to afford 4 more children, three of whom were still in diapers. It would take a while to get certified for foster care and the entire time they lived with me until I was, I would not get financial help caring for them. Then there was the mater of space and where to put them. In reality, our house is too small for my family of 6 let alone adding four more into the mix. Also was the mater of my landlord allowing the extra bodies into which is essentially HIS house. I got a big fat no on that one. It is not that he is a bad landlord, he is excellent actually, it was more of a worry about fire safety and such. I scoured our local newspaper for a larger place but there was nothing available. Everything was either smaller or way out of our price range. It is impossible to pay $800 for rent on our income. Regrettably I had to say goodbye.
Up until they came to live with Jenna and Frank, I had met the oldest two boys only once. The other two I had only heard about their births. During the short time they were here, I fell in love with them. I will miss these little guys every day and I pray that wherever their lives take them they will continue to be cherished and loved as much as they deserve to be.
*Names have been changed for privacy
I have not written about this yet as I have been busy and needed to come to terms with the fact that as much as I want to,I cannot save the world and help everyone in it, no matter how much they mean to me.
Shortly before Christmas, My extended family had a small crisis. My sister-in-law (Jenna*)and her husband (*frank) wound up with temporary custody of his 4 great grandsons ages 10 months to 6 years. We (my Jenna and I) spent a lot of time going from one charity or agency to another for about 4 days in a row to get things these sweet little boys needed. I bought enough items for the boys to have a small Christmas even though I should have used it on bills. I just couldn't see 4 kids going without on a day children anticipate all year.
The children were removed from their home because of neglect. I spent additional money on lice shampoos and sprays, cough medicines, diapers, and Tylenol. I did not care, as long as the boys were happy, healthy, and safe. Jenna and Frank are a bit older than my husband and I. She has rheumatoid arthritis and he has a myriad of health issues including heart problems and caring for them was proving to be extremely difficult and detrimental to their own health. I took the boys whenever possible to give them a break, it seems I always had at least one of them in my home.
Two weeks ago, they boys went into the foster care system. Frank had been having chest pains on and off for a week and his doctor told him he was on the verge of another heart attack if he continued to care for the boys. The stress of taking in 4 little ones that young was just too much. I tried so hard to find a way to take the boys myself. I plotted, planed, and schemed. I made countless phone calls to various agencies but in the end I guess it just wasn't meant to be. I barely get by on my bills even with both my husband and I working, how was I going to afford 4 more children, three of whom were still in diapers. It would take a while to get certified for foster care and the entire time they lived with me until I was, I would not get financial help caring for them. Then there was the mater of space and where to put them. In reality, our house is too small for my family of 6 let alone adding four more into the mix. Also was the mater of my landlord allowing the extra bodies into which is essentially HIS house. I got a big fat no on that one. It is not that he is a bad landlord, he is excellent actually, it was more of a worry about fire safety and such. I scoured our local newspaper for a larger place but there was nothing available. Everything was either smaller or way out of our price range. It is impossible to pay $800 for rent on our income. Regrettably I had to say goodbye.
Up until they came to live with Jenna and Frank, I had met the oldest two boys only once. The other two I had only heard about their births. During the short time they were here, I fell in love with them. I will miss these little guys every day and I pray that wherever their lives take them they will continue to be cherished and loved as much as they deserve to be.
*Names have been changed for privacy
Jan 18, 2009
How To Tell When Your Son is Home From College
12 ways you can tell your Son is home from college even if your haven't seen him:
1. You bought 2 gallons of milk at 10pm the night before and are completely out of milk at 3pm the next day.
2. Your washer seems to be running 24hrs a day instead of the usual 20.
3. That brand new bottle of laundry soap you bought a week ago is empty already.
4. You go to take a shower and when you turn the water on you get sprayed in the head EVERY time.
5. All 5 boxes of cereal only have enough left in them for a mouse.
6. All your mixing bowls are dirty and you haven't cooked or baked in a week because you have been at work. The mixing bowls also have various dried up pieces of cereal in them.
7. When you open the refrigerator to get a drink and think "I know I had a two full bottles of juice in here two days ago!"
8. You go to the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in AGAIN!
9. There is no toilet paper on the toilet paper dispenser.
10. The gas hand in your car is on E constantly.
11. You find Burger king bags in your car and haven't ate fast food in a month.
12. You find THIS in your computer chair:
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
